


What to say (when its all mending)

by Mintie (orphan_account)



Series: What to say. [3]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Mentions of alchoholic, Multi, mentions of domestic abuse, mentions of sexual abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-27
Updated: 2017-10-27
Packaged: 2019-01-25 06:31:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12525168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Mintie
Summary: Tenko Chabashira was stupid, young and dumb.She needed solace.But can someone like her every really get it?





	What to say (when its all mending)

"Hey, Tenko?"

"Yeah Shuichi?" The girl turned to look towards the boy.

"...you'll never leave me behind, right. Because you have Takahashi and Shiori now?"

"..."

"Tenko?"

"Of course not, is Saihara kidding!" She giggled .  
"Tenko and Shuichi will be buddies forever, no way will we ever be apart!"

"Promise" He said doing one of those rare sincere smiles.

"Promise!" Tenko smiled back.

\---

Tenko screamed as she was brought back into reality, scratching her nails into her scull will blotches from tears all down her cheeks.

She just couldn't forget huh?

"Are you okay?" Tenko turned her head towards a gentle light coming from her bedroom door.

"Himiko? Everything is fine..." Tenko lied through her teeth, and it was obvious.

"..." Himiko raised an eyebrow as if to question the other girls integrity.

"..." Tenko covered her face with the sheet, admitting to defeat as she broke down into peaces, feeling a warm hand on her shoulder, which, to be honest wasn't completely unwelcome.

\---

"What's with that dude, I swear he's such a little creep, right Tenko...TENKO!"

Jumping up in shock as Shiori snapped her fingers in her face. She made her apologies.  
"Sorry sorry! W-who did you say was a creep?!"

"This boy from my calculus, names Shuichi Saihara, he stutters all the time, what a weirdo right?"

"..."

"Tenko?" Shiori groaned  
"What's up with you?"

"He's not that bad if you get to know him...he's just, shy is all!"

"Hgh, sounds like bull- wait don't tell me you have the ho-"

"No oh god it's not that!" Tenko threw her hands forward shaking a no to her cousin.

"He's like...family..."

This wasn't the first time she'd defended him, kids can be so cruel, so merciless. He couldn't defend himself, the world was just cruel on that boy, he deserved a break.

_[_ _Who would have known what exactly would turn out to be that break]_

\---

"Vroom vroom!"

The six year old girl mimicked the green van with the shattered missing back windows cackled noise, Saihara sat next to her, giggling.

His dad was never around, he left before Saihara was even born, his brother decided to stand up and take his younger brothers responsibility.

He was a bum, but honestly, out of all the gross boys in the world, bar Saihara, he was one of the only good, honest Guys she'd ever met.

He was a detective, such a cool drop huh? Catching all the baddies.

Both of them saw him as a superhero.

"You guys hungry? How about I get you...cucumber and carrots!"

"No way! It's Friday!" Saihara whined, as he got a little look.  
"I-I mean, no thank you."

"Well then, hmm, guess you don't want a kids meal."

"Yes!" Both Tenko and Saihara yelled in unison.

As they sat in the back of that van every week. Eating the fries and burger that mum could never know about and Saihara Uncle playing music anti socially load. She felt a feeling of happiness overflowing.

Moments like that were always rare.

\---

Ruffling through the first aid box, Tenko pulled out rubbing alcohol.

Shattered glass covered the floor from where her farther had just had his episode, and Tenko forehead was cut pretty bad.

It was no wonder mom left, but why couldn't she bring Tenko with her.

[Because she never wanted you, of course]

She could clean up the mess, this wasn't the first time. One day she might just snap back.

Probably not.

\---

"Come on Tenk Tenk, just try it!"

"N-nah, T-I don't drink-"

"Come on!"

There was never any wine in the Chabashira family cabinet, well, none since lovely Uncle Gray came to help his brother get sober.

Tenko had never touched the stuff, even when it was there, not because they tell you about peer pressure and the dangers of substance abuse in the lessons she had hardly been attending. But just because of the fat old toad, stuck on his add 24/7 with breath oaked in vodka and Schweppes. Not that she didn't care about him, she would have already let him rot if she didn't, but he's always grunting, always pissed. She was so glad when Gray brought Shiori and Takahashi and moves into the space rooms. It was like the backup team in a RPG, like everything was getting better.

Shiori was the definition of peer pressure, and Takahashi Rio had locked up the bedroom door to make out or-whatever, this place was even more of a hell hole.

He leaves for one business trip, leaving poor Mr Chabashira to...his own devices. Shiori had let in half the estate for a rager.

Shuichi was hiding in the corner, clearly uncomfortable, Tenko shouldn't have called him over, she knows, but she needs his presence to keep her calm.

"..."

She grabbed the whiskey bottle out of the other girls hands and chugged.

There was a clap from some people around her, but as soon as it was all down, she pegged it up to the bathroom.

She forgot to lock the door in the panic...

"...Chabashira?"

She turned hastily.

"...Yonaga?"

"..." The tanned girl looked up awkwardly, letting Tenko realised she's flashing on her own first.

As Tenko jumps up and grabs a tissue to wipe her now bright maroon face, she hears a giggle.

"Come on, let's get Shuichi and head down the park or something, this really isn't our scene."

"Yeah, sounds good."

\---

"I think it's going to rain!"

"So what Chabashira! Nature!"

Once at the top of the hill, Saihara seemed pretty short breathed, even Angie's face had flushed a red color.

"How are you not tired, Chabashira?" Angie seemes amazed, sitting down, next to Saihara, making her way to sit down, next to them, Tenko stretched her arms out.

"I guess I'm just full of energy!"

"Yeah" Saihara giggled "I remember back in first year she was obsessed with Akido, the Kung Fu master!"

"...seriously?" Tenko covered her face in embarrassed...and shame.

"There's a difference between Kung Fu and Aikido."

"It's fine Chabashira" Angie smiled " don't freat over the past, living in the now is the key!"

...

Live in the now...

Chabashira looked into the distance at the city, busy streets and happy homes giving off something of an illuminate light show.

In that moment, it felt like the world just stopped, in all the hustle and bustle that had become the norm there was a moment of peace. Just the three of them, no Shiori, no school, no smell of last night's beer. No struggle, just, peace. It made her feel that, just maybe, somewhere, there was something better that this, and she was going to reach it.

"Hey, Yonaga?"

"Yes?"

"...call me Tenko."

\---

"Ugh, I feel so dizzy! Tenko, Pas gonna kill us!"

"...I'll handle it." She groaned back at the Zombie Shiori, turns out she did get that hangover she denied yesterday.

To be fair, Tenko didn't feel at her best either, but one for all right. No matter how much she despises her cousin, it was better for everyone that Gray never found out about this.

Once downstairs was, mostly clear. Tenko draped the one clean blanket in the house over her passed out farther, he was out like a light once Shiori got some shots down him, in any other circumstance she'd have got slapped one, but it made it easier now, she supposed.

It was just as she was cleaning up the sick someone left behind all over the bathroom sink, she heard the clicking of the front door open.

"...!"

"..." As he sighed, her Uncle put down his breath case.

"Goodmorning, Tenko."

He seemed calm, though dissapointed.

"..." She decided just to be blunt "your used to it huh?"

"Yeah" he chuckled picking up a mop.  
"I am displeased though, I thought I made it clear to Shiori that she can't be drinking here, she always was immature huh?" He smiled "at least you're not, Tenko, your sensible."

"...yeah"

The room was silent for a moment.

"Don't you have plans for today?"

"...not really."

"What about the small...ugh let me guess boy?"

Tenko couldn't help but laugh "yeah!"

"My friend works at the Cafe, down South street, you say your my Neice and I'm sure you get some free stuff."

"...really? Thanks."

[Idiot idiot idiot]

\---

"So, she made you drink huh?" Saihara laughed "so, how was your first time?"

"Don't phrase it like that!"

"Sorry sorry!" Saihara giggled.

"Still, your uncle sure is nice, I thought you said he was weird."

"Well now he's giving us free food so!"  Tenko smiled sitting down on the other side of the bed.

"Yeah, but really." Saiharas tone became more serious "didn't you say you hadn't even properly met him before last month."

"...nah, trust me..." She smiled, earnestly.  
"I'm not some weak ass!"

\---

Things started to change, too much to quickly.

Beer was back in the house, for Uncle Grays weekly meet ups with his mates to watch the game.

It should have been a small change, but it opened up the door to bigger problems.

Tenko remembers the day she walked in to see her farther lay face first in his own sick, shaking.

It was the last day of a future which led to what she is now.

It wasn't as if much changed for anyone else, even Tenko admitted at that point the man was just a meatbag to feed. But it still hurt to know he was gone, being an orphan wasn't fun.

It meant that Tenko had to help out more.

It meant her uncles weekly meetups were the worst part of her week.

Something about them, just didn't feel right.

Prolonged touches on the arms, feeling constantly watched.

It was...uncomfortable.

But there wasn't much she could do about it.

\---

Danganronpa was a escape.

It became like a drug.

She knew it wasn't healthy, she knew it  was weird, but everyone enjoyed it, and so did she.

Autumn hit and things got worse, it was Gray this time holding a party and Tenko was practically begged not to come out, to help keep the house In check.

'Saihara wouldn't have liked it' and Yonaga was sick , which left her alone with nothing to do anyway.

And nothing bad could happen really?

Right?

Wrong.

\---

Tenko Chabashira woke up on the floor of the spare bedroom, the cold floor feeling almost like a block of ice.

She almost had no memory of the night before, and going to pull her phone of her pocket.

She realized that her pocket wasn't even there, and it was like a trigger switched in her brain. Memories flooding back.

And she felt her body go stiff, for a few moments that felt like a eternity, processing. And it was like a cue, she picked herself up, went to her room, pulled a twenty out of her pillowcase she was hiding from shiori, grabbed a pair of shorts, and walked out the door.

\---

She ended up calling at seven am, Saihara was still asleep so, it was in a voicemail she poured out her heart, saying goodbye as she got on the bus to god knows where at this moment. To be honest, Saihara was the only one that she had, no one is going to miss her, except maybe Yonaga. But Shuichi was the only one who'd been here through it all.

Throughout everything, losing her mother, her having to spent nights in the hospital because her dad stumbled in at three in the morning and fell down the stairs. He'd always been there no matter what. She said goodbye, for what she thought would be the last time, until she stepped off that bus, and a familiar green van with a smashed window could be seen parked outside.

She turned back, but the bus had already started moving on, before she could do anything the shorter boy had ran over and pulled her into a tight hold. His uncle stood at a distance, clearly stressed.

Instead of backing away, Tenko just. Scwarled, she wailed and wailed, on the floor in the middle of the street.

Sometimes she thinks it was good they found her, sometimes she thinks maybe freezing to death on the streets may have been better than the decision she made afterwards.

\---

"Your such a filthy liar, I can't believe I ever thought we could be friends."

...

Shiori thought she was a liar. Takahashi two.

It was their own dad, she couldn't blame them.

As time went on, she became more and more unsure about it. No matter how many times Saihara reassured her, she could never bring herself to think about it, yet the memory never faded. Even under a completely different roof, she never felt safe.

Angie and Saihara always stood up for her. Gossip spreads fast. Honestly, the insomnia, the rumours, and all that pressure. She just wanted to top it all.

That's when an idea spouted.

It was Saiharas the year before,but he changed his mind quick enough.

It was a way to have a purpose, to become something more than what she is. To become _someone entirely different._

She searched up Danganronpa sign-ups, and two months later...

There she was.

\---

"So...do you want to talk about it?" Himiko asked sitting down on the sofa with two steaming cups of coffee (the dejavu is unreal)

"No..."

"...okay"

This hadn't happened for a while, in fact, Tenko had always been more cautious of Himiko having another breakdown. Sure, they say that the winners of dr have much less trauma, but Himiko was just as fragile inside, she picked it up back then and she figured it out now.

"...actually, yes..." Tenko, gulped trying to think up words.

\---

As she finally finished, Tenko...didn't know what to expect. She looked down, she couldn't help the sick feeling in the bottom of her stomach.

She felt selfish...she wishes she was the Tenko Chabashira from Danganronpa. Strong, independent. She wishes she was open, she wishes she could show her emotions like her. She wishes she could go back to not knowing. She wishes that the seance was real, she wishes she had really di-

She felt arms around her. It was familiar...

It reminded her of _him_ for a moment.

[He doesn't deserve to be dead if it wasn't for you he'd still be here dammit it'd be so much better.]

But it wasn't Shuichi, it was Himiko Yumeno, the redhead full of magic and hope.

And dare she say it.

This was actually even better.

\---

"Hey, Tenko? You feeling okay? Is Gonta boring you?"

"No! T-I'm sorry!" Tenko giggled, trying to shrug off the fact she wasn't listening. The way Gotta speaks used to annoy her, but now it was actually adorable.

"Oh, Gonta glad! Kirumis big day coming up huh? Is it true that Iruma is wedding planner?"

Tenko nodded.

"Nice! She has good taste so Gonta sure it will be wonderful day."

"...yeah"

Gonta seemed to notice something was amiss.  
"Is Tenko okay?"

"Gokuhara...do you ever...think about him?"

"...Shuichi, you mean?"

"Yeah..."

"..." Gonta smiled "I think... Well yes, sometimes, he be happy, if he see us all from heaven, he want us to be happy to, he be sat with atua up there."

"Yeah...your probably right..." Tenko said, the slightest smile forming.

"...if you are thinking you want to talk, Gonta will be here for you! He actually had a similar convasation with Kokichi, troubled man, heartbroken on valentines day."

"..."

\---

"Hello?"

As Tenko slammed open the door, Ouma turned around, shocked.

"...Chabashira?"

"Answer me now!" She yelled over him.  
"Did you love him?"

"...what?"

"Did you? Did you love Saihara?!"

"..."

Tenko, shouldn't have been shocked.

But seeing Kokichi Ouma cry, for real, was...

"...I'm sorry..."

Tenko curled into the floor.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I just-"

"He was perfect wasn't he?"

"..."

Kokichi smiled looking up at the ceiling light.

"I never got to tell him, I was such a coward, I mean I had so much opportunity."

"Opportunity?"

"He used to visit me, everyday, in hospital, at first he couldn't bring himself to, and I can't blame him..." He took in a breath "I don't know how he forgave me. No one else could..."

"Didn't Gonta?"

"Not until a couple months ago." He spun the pen still in his hand.  
"Yumeno was the first to visit me, you know."

"...she did?"

He hummed as he nodded his head yes.

"Don't get me wrong, I think deep down she wanted to pummel me...but I think she knew...something she said, it made me think." He closed his eyes.  
"Maybe it's better I didn't tell Saihara how I felt."

"...but-"

"He wasn't the same person, it'd have been wrong."

"..."

"...Chabashira?"

"Is that what you think...so, ex participants shouldn't be together?"

"...it depends..." He turned around, going back to writing up his report.  
"I mean, Amami and Kirumi love eachother, in the real world, not our dillusion. They know each other, really, it's not the pretend Kirumi hosting to party tonight, and it's not Amami the ultimate suiting up to make an honest woman out of her." He smiled.  
"If you love someone, you have to know who they are, that's why I hate lies, especially lying to yourself."

...

It's time to come clean.

\---

"You got it bad huh?" Yukizome smirked, cleaning up spilled coffee on the counter.

She was grateful the women would close her own shop early just so her employee can pine in the corner.  
Alas, Yukizome being...Yukizome, it was more so she could get deats.

"When did you realize? Or did you already know? Ah-"

"I didn't want to admit it to myself!" She hissed as she covered her face.  
"It's why I didn't want to see her okay! I didn't want this to happen! And now we're fudging roommates!"

"I know! It's almost like a sitcom!" Yukizome giggled for a moment, before abruptly stopping as she noticed the angry, flustered face of Tenko Chabashira looking up at her.  
"Still, you sure she doesn't like you back?"

"It doesn't matter!" Tenko took in a breath.  
"After everything, it wouldn't feel right, you know-"

"Hmm, really, well..." Yukizome walked over to the machine, grabbing a paper cup.  
"I suppose so, but I'd I was you, you have to try." She smiled in the warm way only Yukizome Chisa could do.  
"You'll never be happy if you hide your true feelings..."

"..."

"Here, get this down you!" Yukizome smiled,sliding a cup of steaming coffee in front of the other.

"You're gonna need this if you're gonna be at that party all night."

"...your not my mom."

Yukizome giggled.

"..." Tenkos lips curled upwards.  
"Thank you...Yukizome."

\---

The meetup was awkward, at first.

But people were drinking like it was the 1700s and doctors were coming to saw their legs off, so before long, things got heated.

No one was drinking more than Tenko Chabashira.

Himiko was coming after work, and Tenko had arrived early, so...she sat idly in the corner, waiting. There was already a good few empty glasses piled on the table already, it was gonna be a long night and Tenko needed something to keep her from becoming a flustered mess.  
Sure, it wasn't a permanent solution, but as past events have shown, Tenko wasn't quite good at those.

"Are you sure that you should be drinking so much, especially now, it's quite early?"

She turned to see a tall figure, long coal black hair tied neatly in a bun.

"..."

"I'm sorry, it's not my place." Shinjuki nodded.  
"I just...I came to apologize for my actions."

He took in a breath.  
"I must let you know how disgusting I felt about everything that happened during the...game, and I hope we can, if anything, be civil any time we come into contact in the future." He put out a hand, to shake, she supposes.

Under 'normal' circumstances, Tenko would have taken the bandaged hand, and shook, but in the expression of his scarred face, bloodshot eyes, the ones of a man once fixated on ending her life for his own warped, twisted fantasy.

"Y-yes, please excuse me!"

\---

As she wiped her face, Tenko heard the door behind her open.

"...Yonaga, you made it."

The girl smiled brightly back.

"Long time no see Cha cha! How's it going!"

She hadn't changed at all.

She still _looked_ the same Angie she always was.

Sweet, innocent Angie.

After her...breakdown, team Danganronpa was prompt to get her institutionised.

It was best for everyone, it was best for Angie, apparently.

Still, it meant Tenko lost the only friend she had left...it was when she started fending for herself...

But she was here now.

"Great, well...kinda." Tenko smiled, awkwardly.

"Yeah I saw." Angie walked over.  
"What happened?"

"...it wasn't his fault, I just..." She sighed.  
"I know that it's really rude."

She hummed, nodding.

"I get it, he gave me the same speech, same shock." She smiled, patting Tenkos back.

"I swear I thought Himiko was going to try to flip him."

"...Himiko?"

"Yeah." Angie looked in the mirror at Tenko.  
"She had just walked in, I think. She full on jumped at him."

"..."

"You miss him too, don't you..." Angie looked down.  
"...I never said, but...I loved him, Shuichi." She sighed.

"...yeah I already know that it was pretty obvious."

Angie burst into laughter.  
"I think that's why I lost it...Shinjuki, he's trying to help me cope..."

"Are you two?"

"Oh...yeah" Angie sighed "honestly, I don't know if it's gonna work out, but I owe it to myself to try."

"..."  
"Well..." Angie decided to change the conversation "if you're feeling better, I was hoping, we could talk, you know, if you want I can send Shinjuki away, he'll understand. I've wanted to meet up with you for ages actually." She smiled.

\---

Tenko downed another shot, now she was able to take her drink without being sick, she was sure as hell taking Kirumis free bar to advantage.

Yumeno was being lectured by Kirumi, and ended up sat with Gonna and Kokichi. It was probably best to pretend she wasn't here, it'd been a long day.

"You okay Tenko."

"...you know what, I just wanna get wasted and have a good time for once, right?" Tenko threw her arms in the air

"..." The other girl smiled

It was about an hour later that Tenko and Angie both running down the street with empty ice buckets on their heads.

\---

The next thing that Tenko remembers is Gonta and Iruma in the car.

"Gonta no think that Chabashira would ever get so drunk."

"I mean, its funny!" Iruma couldn't help but smirk.  
"But still, why? Why did she have to try and eat a cactus?"

"Gonta...was more concerned when she and Angie both jumped up on glass table."

Yes, before long that girl couldn't even stand up on her own.

The door opened.

"So, Yumeno, you gonna look after your girlfriend now?" Iruma grabbed Tenko arms, dragging her towards Himiko.

"She's not my- but yeah, I'll look after her."

\---

Tenko giggled collapsing into the sofa, Yumeno putting down her things.

"You need water."

"I don't wanna!" Tenko whined in her best three year old voice.

"Trust me you'll thank me in the morning." Yumeno said, shoving the water down the other girls throat.

Once it was all down, Himiko sat next to her.

"Your so nice Himiko san!" She said, leaning on the other girls shoulder.

"...why'd you get drunk?" Himiko sighed, not objecting the other girl leaning on her.

"...wha?"

"It's not like you?" Himiko looked out of the rain pattered window "if anything is up you can talk to me."

"...I got drunk coz Saihara went and died!" Tenko dramatically through a hand in the air.

"...really?"

"No!" She chuckled "Tenko.is.not.telling.you."

"...thats fine." Himiko went to stand up.

"It's coz Tenko realized she's a liar!" Tenko yelled, extremely loud considering Himiko was still next to her. And she was clinging to her arm.

"...what do you mean?"

"Shes been lying to herself! And dad used to do that so he drank." She giggled at something normally she'd be upset about "shes been pretending that she's happy, but she is not" she smiled.  
"She misses Saihara soo so so much, and T-"

She leaned towards Himiko.  
"She.loves.you"

"...you what?" Himiko looked shocked.

"She super duper loves you but you can't know that ever coz its a secret!" She whispered as she giggled, until she realized...

"Oops, please excuse Tenko!" And with that, she ran towards the toilet.

\---

"Oh my god..." Yukizome tried to hold back her laughter.

As soon a Tenko woke up she basically ran to Yukizomes place, she needed to get away, fast.

"I know! I ruined everything! And embarrassed myself!"

"No I'm sure it wasn't that bad!" Yukizome tried to reasurre her.

"...I tried to eat a cactus."

As if on cue, the bell at the door rung, as Yukizome turned to dissmiss the person, she emmediatly changed her mind.

"Ah! Harukawa! How are you."

Maki, Tenko and her hadn't properly talked things through, but honestly, Tenko didn't have anything against her.

I mean, everyone has stuff that want to hide.

Tenko royaly fucked that up, huh?

"Is it...a bad time?" She looked down at Tenko.

"No." Yukizome smiled "It's just..."

She mumbled into Makis ear, who's eyes suddenly widened.

"Before you say anything I-"

"Chabashira, I'm going to be blunt with you here." She sat down in the chair opposite her.  
"You know that green ribbon, the one you used to wear?"

Tenko nodded.

"She used to sleep with it, and you know, cry hugging it. Me and...Shuichi both tried to calm her down, but she always used to talk about you. She loved you, and I'm pretty sure she still does."

"..."

"Anyway, I came to talk to you, Yukizome, about later."

"..."

\---

Tenko decided, she had to go back at some point, right?

Once she was inside, she saw Himiko stood with a mop.

She couldn't make eye contact, she just mumbled a sorry as she sped walked to her room.

Picking up what she would need to survive. Clean clothes, toothbrush, etc.

She walked out of her room, heading towards the door.

When she felt someone grab her shoulder.

"Yeah, can we please...talk about it?"

"...!"

\---

The shorter girl sat down again in the coffee shops booth, putting down the two coffees.

"You feeling okay?"

"..." Tenko nodded, though the sick feeling in her stomach hadn't gone away, it definitely wasn't from the hangover, she knew that.

"...about, what you said, did you mean-"

"Yes! Okay yes!" Tenko covered her face, not feeling able to hold back tears.  
"Tenko is sorry! It's just T-T, Tenko knows it's selfish but!"

She felt a peck on her cheek.

"...?!"

She turned to look down at the red head. Who smiled up at her.

"Shut up, your the opposite of selfish." She smiled "don't get this drunk again though! Seriously this morning I was really worried!"

"..."

In that moment, Tenko couldn't help but smile.

After it all, if she can find a reason to smile. After everything she can find solace in Himiko Yumeno.

Then hope is real.

**Author's Note:**

> I planned to finish this differently, but I felt like Tenko deserved a chapter.
> 
> There are a few things I'm unhappy with having to cut out, stuff to do with Angie, Shirogane and Iruma. But I can always keep those ideas for future work I guess.


End file.
